Monday, December 12, 2005

How A Server Can Make A 50% Tip Off Me The Easy Way

Today I took a break from my Christmas shopping to stop at a local establishment for lunch. The server was good enough to get the 20% gratuity I usually leave when I receive the check (I only tip 15% when the service is not good; anything less is rude, mean-spirited, and heartless). However, one comment she made to me as she left the check caused me to reconsider and to boost the gratuity to 30%: she wished me "Happy Holidays."

I throw around "Merry Christmas" perhaps more than "Happy Holidays." But I cannot stand the attempts by the pompous asses in our society to try to intimidate others because they are under the delusion that their Christian faith--which they seem to equate with buying material goods--is under some sort of attack because somebody wishes them well using innocent words like "Holiday." So, every time a server wishes me "Happy Holidays" I'm bumping up their tips 10%. It's not a matter of my faith for me. It's simply a matter of stirring the pots of the pompous.

Oh, and any server who, between now and Christmas Day, wishes me "Happy Holidays" immediately after I wish them "Merry Christmas" will get a 50% tip. 'Tis the season of giving!

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